You know what’s awkward?
When the hottest Italian boy you’ve ever seen comes into your office and iTunes decides “I Touch My Self” is best for setting a tone of professionalism and competence.
You know what’s more awkward than that?
When you walk into the restroom and the woman in the first stall wants an audience to witness her attempt at extracting the devil from her ass, so she doesn’t close the door.
You know what’s even more awkward than that?
When the email address auto-feature decides you should embrace honesty and routes your “don’t tell dad…” email to your dad instead of your brother.
I bet you can’t guess what’s even more awkward than that?
When your boss sends you a gracious email asking for your input on a meeting that 2 of the 3 people in the office will be attending tomorrow.
A word on the Australian Open…
I should be over the moon with Serena Williams’ performance, but I choose, instead, to be deeply wounded by James Blake’s ousting in Round 4. Because I’m an American. A patriot, y’all. It has nothing to do with his looks.
Plus, I’m having a love/hate relationship with Serena right now. I can’t get over the fact that she’s worn the same outfit 2 days in row. And her bra keeps showing. And I hate myself for being critical of anyone who knows how to rock a flower.
Shit, I gotta start playing tennis.
